The light shone altogether too brightly. Reflecting off the crystal heart hanging from the hook, and bouncing in glints and glimpses around the room. A cacophony of colours each more painful than the last. She moved to the stairs, secured by the walls and windowless space. The dim was safer than the unspoilt sun, it wrapped itself around her, seeping into her skin and settling in her heart. Here she waited for the
Creak of the weather beaten door and muffled thud of the latch quiet in loss and care and uncertainty from half way down half way up there she sat with broken eyes broken mind no hope no hope no hope as he brought his anguish and fear and overwhelming hazel tear stained gaze written all over his face with no need for words no need to speak the turmoil and future the hope and life that cease to be,
with one imperceptible nod and hand covered face of silent tears that will pour and pour when shock runs dry one bear gripped close one mind ravaged still one time never recovered one dark polished rose carved table six chairs one loss and hands that cover faces with shoulders rubbed and patted distinct and alone in horror and expectancy flashes and blurs eternally burned into the
minds eye recalls all
slumber or none as it was how it felt or how it seemed never clear only maybe maybes perhaps.
And darkness infiltrated the dim, as she breathed it in.
its that time of year. my mind goes into overdrive, my body responds to circumstances beyond my control, and i question my sanity regularly throughout the day.
my blog becomes sparse this time of year. my journal pages are overflowing. and my eyes become that much more troubled and tired.
i realised quite soon on, anger only gets you so far. there is only so much energy that can be expended on it. until eventually, although you know exactly what you are justifiably angry at, you wonder what the point is.
what the point of anything is.
what the point of life is if he is not in it.
i fight so hard not to be sad. and overwhelmed. and completely buried with missing and longing. i avoid a lot of things because i fight so hard against all of that.
i don't listen to certain songs. or watch movies that will obviously bring me to tears. i fill my world with pretty things, and plans, and hide my secrets under layers of paint and pain.
but somtimes it creeps in.
i have good friends. who send me texts with nothing but the words, 'i am here.' and post sent so that it arrives on the most unperfect of perfect days. friends who understand, perhaps the hardest thing i struggle with, is not my personal missing. but his life that was cut short.
my friend wrote this for me. and i can't think of a better thing for this week to share with you, my dear readers.
There are quite a few parodies of the NOM's video I posted last week. But this has to be the best I've seen so far.
article no. 4: stupid beard. playing stupid with beardless-brother-in-law.
hello theartisfound :)
we're back. with one of my favorite things, literally and metaphorically. you can see the art journal page that was created in this video here or here. (or of course tumblrrrrr, my latest online addiction.)
i havn't made videos in so long. i need to do more. this was originally going to be more v-logy. but that didn't happen.
article no.2: starbucks beard!
This is so american, and not really in the good way.
I'm not sure how a Doctor will have to choose between their faith and their job? Is this seriously suggesting only heterosexual people deserve medical treatment? Coz i'm baffled. Its insinuated that gay people have already been allowed to live together, what more can they possibly want? I mean, they shouldn't even be allowed to do that, right?!
Surely this war is lost? Are they not fighting for something that our generation just doesn't agree with? Thats how I feel everytime I see this endless battle against homosexual marriage. Its not as if heterosexual marriage is doing so well.
And even if there was an arguement for this, that didn't involve mixing religion and politics (something I don't think Jesus advocates), surely this is not the way to go about it? What arguement is this against loss of inheritance rights? Or the fact that medical decisions would not be allowed by a homosexual partner? Amongst other civil rights that are lost to homosexual partnerships.
I can't agree, as a married heterosexual, that to allow same sex couples to get married would effect my life. It wouldn't change the way I live. It just wouldn't. This video makes ludicrous claims that make me laugh in amazement.